From: Rev.Smith (willsmithjazz@yahoo.com) 

Phone: 234-865-3454 

I'm Rev.Smith that needs a tutor for my child base on your advert.Sandra is 19 year old and easily watch.What's your charges and where do you reside in the Usa,i understand you are in Usa.

Will

God Bless

Hi Rev. Smith.  Thanks for writing.  I would be happy to instruct your daughter. Do you live in Nashville?

Thanks,

Steve

Hi Steve

  I really appreciate your response, i want you to have a trust in this transaction and make sure you teach my daughter properly.I've forward your information to my associate to make the payment and i will get back to you as soon as the payment is sent.Please i will like you to email me with you cell #,Home # for easier conversation in future Okay?Awaiting your response Asap.

Will

God Bless

But where do you live? 

Steve

Hi Steve,

Thanks for the question,i live in Sandiego in Carlifornia but now i am in United Kingdom for a Reverend tour for couple of month will soon be back home.I want you to email me the resquested as instructed earlier in the mail Okay?Awaiting your response Asap.

Will

God Bless

Oh wow, Carlifornia is beautiful... but it's 2300 miles from me! Don't you think you can find a drum instructor that's closer to you?   

Steve 

 Hi Steve

Yeah you are right,i want you to teach my daughter Drum lesson because she is a beginner,so all i need from you is the total amount for two month lesson for 3 days/week/1hr,then i will also need the Payable Name and Address where the Cashier's Check or Money Order will be mailed to because my associate that wanted to issue out the payment will be leaving for another country on a business trip don't worry my cousin have an apartment in Nashville,TN to accomodate my daughter during the whole period of the lessons,so i want eveything to be as quick as possible also i want you to email me with your schedule for the lesson.I'll continue praying for people like you is interested in broughting up younger ones that everything you lay your hands upon will shall come to pass Amen Okay?Awaiting your response Asap.. 

Will

God Bless

Okay, then. I normally get around $100 per lesson, x 3 per week, x 2 months is $2400.  Please deposit $2400 into my Paypal account online and tell me when you'd like to start the lessons. 

Or send a check for $2400 to:

Fork's Drum Closet

2701 12th Ave S 

Nashville, TN 37204

Accommodate Sandra I will, Reverend. You can bet on that. Also, I appreciated your prayer. As you said, " for people like you is interested in broughting up younger ones that everything you lay your hands upon will shall come to pass." 

Wow. Thanks, man!

Steve 

Phone # Needed

Will

God Bless

Email's fine by me. 

Steve

Hi Steve,

 Thanks for the mail and the information provided,the total price is alright for my Daughter 2 mouth which is $2400.00 for lessons.I'm happy for your years of experience and i will reallyappreciate if you handle Sandra properly, take her as you own Daughter because i like to put my Daughter incare of people like you who is ready to brought up young ones,I'll continue praying for you as a Rev father.Your payment plus the travelling fee including the materials that will be purchased by my cousin for my Daughter lesson has been sent in your Name&Address which is ?????, c/o Fork's Drum Closet,2701 12th Ave S Nashville, TN 37204USA right?also i'll like you to email me with your cell phone #,by my  associate who is owning me some amount of money then said he will include it on a Cashier's Check or Money Order.And also his travelling out of the state tommorow this is the reason why the  payment has quickly been sent Via mail for $5,000.00,so you will DEFINATELY get the payment before the lesson date which is September 17Th soon as you cash the check you would need to deduct your amount of ($2400.00) from the total of ($5,000.00) and send the remaining balance to my cousin via western union money transfer who would be using the money to care for my Daughter and buy some instrument for him for practising at home also about the transportation my Daughter will be the one to come over to you location with a Car for the lesson and you don't have to travel anywhere. 

Note:Once again i'm happy for you ,you've really done great,Sandra is a beginner in learning and you can take the lesson at a cool place that's alright with me and with your experience i think you can contribute perfectly to my Daughter's lesson for i'm busy in a reverend tour  i will soon be back here is my number in the uk +447024024116 or +447031947070  

Will

God Bless

Thanks, Reverend.  I look forward to handling your daughter.

Steve

(10 minutes later)

Mr. Reverend! I know it's only been ten minutes but I'm starting to get worried.  Has the money been mailed?

Steve 

Not to worry the moneys has been sent. You will call me in the uk +447024024116 for directions for western union money transfer to my cousin. I trust you completeley as we are friends and i'll like you to email me with your cell phone # for my associate. Please ASAP.

Will

God Bless

Dear Reverend. I was wondering if you could describe your daughter so I'll know her when I see her. Like, is she tall, short? Hair color, eye color, height, weight, measurements, you know? So I recognize her. Does she have any moles, freckles, birthmarks, cowlicks, piercings, tattoos, or scars? Also if you could mail her dental records, fingerprints, birth certificate and immunization history that would be great, too. Thanks!

Steve

The money is sent. pLease email me with your cell phone #. My associate needs it now. ASAP

Will

God Bless

I got the check in my hand. I can't believe it!

Steve

No go to western union money transfer and call me in the uk +447024024116. cell # needed ASAP!

Will

God Bless

I have to use a public line because I dropped my cell phone into some chili. Anyway, that was exciting. I enjoyed the quick conversation. You are very professional. 

Now I can admit something. Instead of cashing your check I sent your associate the whole $5000 and didn't take any of it. I am just so flattered you chose to let me to give Sandra the gift of music. I can't wait to GIVE it to her!

Steve

They said check didn't work. Please resend imm. and CELL ### - call in uk +447024024116

Will

God Bless

Don't worry, Reverend. It's your check so it must be good!  I just endorsed it right to your associate. Without taking a cut! And, I will still take up Sandra. For free! Great news or what?

It is WRONG! and i must speak to you WILL NOT CALL! WHY. PLEASE ASAP in uk +447024024116

Will

God Bless

Why all the CAPS? I said I gave THEM the CHECK you SENT to ME.

I hope my trust did not go to the wrong man. I see it did unles you CALL ME

Will

God Bless

What do you mean you don't trust me? Don't move! I'm going to call you from the same phone as before. I have to use a public line because I crushed my cell phone while sledding. Let's see if we can't just sink to the bottom of this.

(Later)

The conversation today was a little confusing. You just kept yelling and I said "I SENT a check" and on and on and then wow! You'd have to be really angry to say those things. Whew. I thought you were kidding but now I don't know

I think you owe me an apology. How do you respond?

You are a fool and a dog. NEVER CALL. YOU ARE CRAZY FOOL IDOIT THAT I HAVE NO TRUST FOR! NO TRUST FOR!

Will

God Bless

I'm afraid I'm going to need you to take some of that back. And what about Sandra?... Are we still doing those lessons!?!... Will?...

###

Welcome to the House of Rules - Las Vegas!

The House of Rules Las Vegas opened in 1999 and provides classy entertainment for a upscale crowd. Our club has an open air balcony, illuminated dance floor, and over 3000 patron donated bras hanging from the rafters, street signs, and antlers.

House of Rules Las Vegas is a high class party place for descriminating people and features a full bar, spacious dance floor, and "Foxy Boxing" every Sunday afternoon.

In keeping with 'House of Rules' tradition we exhibit genuine and unique imitation folk art, an authentic guitar from the time of Robert Johnson, and we even boast a big ol' glob of Mississippi mud in the fishbowl on the stage.

As they say, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. [Except tattoos, STD's, and alcohol poisoning] So treat yourself to an unforgettable night on the strip, where dashing men dress to impress - and sophisticated ladies show what they got. ["Show what they got" being an accepted term for wearing provocative clothing] At House of Rules you don't have to BE rich and famous to FEEL rich and famous. 

House of Rules!... Vegas style!... where anything can happen... [except the following:]

House Of Rules Rules

In the door:

No - Baggy, saggy, or oversized clothing

No - Tennis shoes, sandals, or boots

No - Faded, ripped, or acid-washed Jeans

No - Hoods, Scarves, Bandanas, Shorts, sweats, jerseys, t-shirts, tanks, tubes

No - Hats, Caps, Helmets, Turbans, Tiaras 

Shoes must be polishable

Shirts must be collared 

Dresses must cover entire nipple/areola and lower cheek area

On the floor:

No - Popping, locking, head spinning

No - Line, pole, or slam dancing

No - Copters, back flips, karate kicking

No - Grinding, thrusting, dry humping

No - Dirty, forbidden, or fire dancing

No - Moon walking - unless you are in sock feet [Please wear shoes at all times.]

If Performing on stage:

No - Profanity, Pyrotechnics, Political rants

No - Modulations, Medleys, Drum solos

No - Stage diving, crowd surfing, head walking

No - Bagging of the venue from stage, bagging of the groupies back stage, bagging in general

No - Complaining about the smell of the mud in the fishbowl

Please load in and out through the alley off W. Russell Rd. on the South side of the building. 

No - Honking during load in

No - Parking during performance

No - Talking during load out

And remember! At House of Rules - Las Vegas, there are no limits! [Except as mentioned above] 

Thief,

You got away with it. You hot wired the van and stole everything. It must feel great. Except that now you have all that "Merchandise" in a room somewhere... and you're hoping nobody got the license plate of the white mini truck in the hotel parking lot. The one parked by the crime scene right before the theft occurred? Don't worry. The video footage is kind of blurry in a couple spots. I'm sure you'll be fine. 

For now at least, you have my drums. Nice one. You did it and got out of the area without getting caught. Which ss huge, because getting caught with a trailer full of stolen musical equipment is a very serious crime. In fact it's a felony! That means you took a really big risk. It's gutsy what you did, only not in a "heroic" way. More like gutsy in an "icky, desperate" way. To pull a crime this brazen the criminal would have to either be gutsy or stupid, and since I don't know you, I'll just assume you are a combination of both guts and stupidity. In fact, I bet you're the type that is REALLY gutsy. And REALLY stupid.

You have accomplished a lot in this crime so far but you've still got to get rid of the stuff and until that happens you have to keep it somewhere. You'll need a place thats safe (to protect your investment) and out of sight (because they're not yours). The fast driving part is over and after going through that you'd be a fool not to get paid, so let's look at some likely scenarios and try to figure out what you will gain from this "job" when it's finished. 

1. Either you work with others to distribute the goods? (Adds witnesses and possible roll overs, and you make less when you cut up the money.) 

2. You work alone and have predetermined buyers? (More witnesses and possible roll overs.) 

3. You are going to sell it yourself slowly? (Even more witnesses! And how long do you want to sit on that hot gear?)

4. Or, you put the stuff in storage and forget about it until things cools off? (How much does it cost a month while you're sitting in risk? And again, how long do you want to sit on that hot gear?)

Most likely you'll have to sell it off fast and cheap, take what you're offered, and get some distance from it. But how much will you really make? And what kind of sleep will you get during the process? Will you get even $500 for my drums? Probably not. They're hot! You can't put them on ebay or craigslist. You can't even put them a major newspaper. You'll have to pawn them for a few bucks or find a drummer to pay more - someone who won't turn on you if they are caught with stolen goods. Do you know any drummers you can trust to keep your secret if they get busted?

But there's more than just the drums. You have my cases, hardware, and cymbals, too. You probably noticed my name on the cases. It's hard to miss in indelible paint. (Oh yes it is.) So the cases are gone. You can still move the cymbals, though. But I'll be checking online to buy the set up I lost so I don't try advertising them together. You also have my trap case, with all the hardware, pedals, and spare parts I'd arranged for a five week tour. I have to tell you, the trap case has a bag full of sticks with my name on them. There are other sticks, too, that I can describe in detail if you're not sure which ones I'm talking about... (Isn't it amazing how many ways you could get caught?) 

I'll bet you won't get $1000 for everything you took from me and yet you've ground my life to a halt. When the band discovered our van and trailer were gone there was really no way to continue. We rented transportation and some gear for an extra week but it was too expensive and cramped so we had to cancel the tour. I had to come home and tell my wife that the shows (and my income) had stopped, and then besides that, I'd lost all my equipment in Philadelphia.

The money you get from the gear may knock off some debt and keep your addictions fed for a couple weeks. But then, unlike legitimate people, who's jobs earn them skills and raises and seniority, you'll be right back where you started! (Isn't that pathetic?) When the Whisky and Pizza are gone you'll have to go find another band to hit, you'll have to take another huge risk, and then be right back to your paranoid apartment. (Isn't that depressing?) But that's only if you're not caught in the act next time, which you realize becomes more likely with every theft. 

For now you've gotten away with it, so while you're "up" I'd like to ask a favor. In return for the gear I worked so hard to earn please take some of the money you receive from this theft and go get yourself a nice, solid vasectomy. You could probably afford one from the cymbal sales alone. Vasectomies have come a long way in the last few years. It takes less than 15 min. per side now and you're back to work in three days. (Or whatever it is you do during the day... Video games?) 

Your vasectomy would be a small silver lining to the dark cloud you brought us, because it would assure the next generation of musicians less chance of being hurt by some "manboy" in Philly, whose lack of smarts and lousy parenting prevented him from being able to support himself and reduced him to hunting and stealing, like some stray Jackal in the Desert. Fifteen minutes per side, thief, and you can stop the glob of useless creatures that may stumble out of your sickly genes.

Do your loved ones know where their birthday presents come from? Do your kids know their Daddy has to drive a stolen van - white knuckled, wide-eyed with fear, tail between his legs - to support them? Did your momma throw a whole litter of Jackal pups or are you just the shame of your family? 

You didn't take everything when you ripped us off, thief. We still have talent and passion and integrity. You'll never have these traits because they're not something you can sneak off with in the night. I'll be back to work eventually and by that time you will either be arrested and convicted - or free to remain trapped in the dreary life you've created for yourself. I'm better than you. In fact, most people are better than you. And we always will be. How depressing is THAT? 

Sleep if you can, little big man. Your time will come.